Stories

I have so many things to be thankful to Mom for. Mainly, her wonderful son, Joe, who is my husband. She and Dad raised an amazing son who is a fantastic husband and dad. I am also so thankful to Mom who was always available to help me out with the girls, even at the last minute. Mom and Dad were the only family we had close by, and they always dropped everything to help out. I would come home from being in therapy with Joey to find Dad sound asleep in the rocker with Coco in his arms, and Mom ironing everything in the house, with Sophia next to her with her play ironing board, and of course groceries bought, and dinner cooking. Another reason I am thankful to Mom is because she was so generous teaching me true Italian cooking. Not just Italian cooking…. she taught me to make so many things, that we still make and I have passed down to her three granddaughters. And it was a summer day highlight to go visit Mom and Dad, and Mom would make something special for the girls for lunch. Sometimes even waffles. I was blessed to marry into the Monaco family, and share so many memories with Mom. It was sweet to look through all our pictures to see the fun times we had with Grammie.

I am Connie’s youngest child, and although I have been regularly teased for having been doted on by her, I must admit that there was some truth to it. But that doesn’t mean that I could do no wrong – I remember many occasions having been chased by her with a wooden spoon in her hand! I think all of my siblings had the same experience, but I can’t remember her ever having caught one of us, or if she did, that the punishment was all that severe. I frankly don’t think she tried that hard – because she was a calm and even-tempered woman who cherished peace and harmony. Those qualities stood in stark contrast to those of my father, who was known for his passion, for speaking his mind, and not worrying about stirring things up. She was the yin to his yang – and I certainly benefitted in learning from both of them.
Mom taught me patience and empathy using phrases that still stick with me – like “you attract more flies with honey than with vinegar”. And even though I initially didn’t know why I would want to attract flies in the first place, I realized what she meant as I grew older. She would also say “to each their own”, and while there were limits to tolerance in the era of my youth, and among her generation, her words conveyed to me the need to pause and step into others’ shoes from time to time.
Mom’s artistry in the kitchen was legendary. Her love of food as a celebration of life derived naturally from her Italian heritage and is one of the ways in which she kept the culture of her immigrant parents alive in America. She grew up in an era that was less than plentiful – as a young girl in the depression, she faced circumstances the likes of which I couldn’t imagine, much less have experienced. She and my father spent their lives ensuring that we would have better lives than theirs, which is what their parents did for them, and which is a hallmark of the Greatest Generation.
She was a wonderful grandmother to my three daughters, and there are qualities of hers that I see in them every day. She adored all of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren immensely and would light up when she would see them. In her later years when her activities became more limited, I always knew I could open a photo album, or bring up pictures of the kids on my phone, and she would be entertained for hours.
I will miss her – her kindness, her good nature, and the way she would smile with her whole face. I am comforted to know that she is at peace, and that she lived her long life in happiness and joy.